Jul 14, 2009
american sentences
Lying side by side :: we are a Rorschach that won’t give up its secrets
::
I ate the apple :: then picked out the seeds and swallowed them one by one
::
The pomegranate had been sliced open :: all I had to do was eat
::
My dreams as heavy as oil :: I wake up trying to remove the filth
::
I sleep until 10 :: all the birds have stopped singing :: sky full of pockets
::
Seeds lay scattered on the sidewalk :: a language we can read with our hands
* * *
Process Notes
These pieces started out as fake haiku that I wrote for the Haiku-a-Day group over on Facebook. I say fake haiku because, well, let’s face it: Not everything that’s 17 syllables is a haiku. I wouldn’t even know where to begin in terms of writing a real haiku. So I turned the pieces into American Sentences, but with my own twist — the double colons as rest designators.
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Actually, I have been reading Falling off the Mountain for so long now that I am quite used to double colons. So there.
I love the way the strong break makes each sentence into a kind of speculation so the reader is left to make connections.
Dave, you’d been reading Falling off the Mountain before I started using my :: regularly. You still hated them and called them “cute.”
Nathan, leaving the reader. That’s what I do.